Cover StoryThe cover is called “Fuck Your Symbols” and I did it because I’ve always wanted to burn an American flag. Garett Holden took the picture while Peter Lopez and I set fire to everything. I got the flags from a creepy old street vendor who had crossed eyes and I bought two flags because they looked so cheap that I thought they would burn too quickly to photograph. While he searched the cardboard box in his van for the flags, he asked me where I was going to put them. I immediately said that I was going to send one to my mom and put the other up in my house, which was a blatant lie. He leaned into me and whispered, “You display this with pride. I did a year in the European theater in WWII and this flag is what America is all about. Let me tell you one quick story...” I wanted to tell him that I was planning to burn the flags and sell copies of the picture to degenerates like me, just so he would shut the fuck up. I got a face full of what I am guessing was whiskey and he said, “My buddy was fightin’ the Japs and he got shot in the back of the head and it [the bullet] came out through his eye. He lost sight in both eyes... [ten minutes of depressing, semi-coherent rambling excised]... Today that man is a minister! A blind minister!” To me it sounded like the biggest waste of a life, ever. From hired killer for his government to a blind, deluded stooge for religion. Boozy McStreetvendor thought it was supposed to be inspirational but it just sounded pathetic to me. As I gave him the $5 for both flags, I noticed that the packaging said the flags were made in China. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that his symbol of freedom was probably made by a slave laborer in Communist China because I didn’t want to dispel his illusions. I would like to dispel your illusions because unlike that vendor, you can read, you bought this zine and I am hoping you that have a brain in your head. If not, please try InStyle.
At this point a car pulled into the alley where we were taking the picture but luckily they just stopped and let it burn.